Turn On The Jets Stock Watch 6/12: Jets, NFL Over/Unders, Tebow

Mike Donnelly gives us his weekly stock report. Who should you be buying or selling this week?

Mike Donnelly is back with his weekly stock watch. Make sure you give Mike a follow on Twitter and give Turn On The Jets a like on Facebook.

It is that time of the week again: Stock Watch! It’s been a busy week with the Jets as always, and in the sports world in general. We had some big news as Santonio Holmes threw his helmet (on no!) and the media had a collective aneurysm running to their computers to throw him under the bus. We also saw a rigged boxing match, the NBA Finals get set (be sure to check out Joe’s Finals preview), the Kings win the Stanley Cup, and the Yankees mop the floor with my Mets and their abomination of a bullpen. We’re gonna touch on some of those with buy and sell advice, but this week the big stock tips come in the form of some NFL over/unders for wins. Vegas released their totals two weeks ago, and after several sleepless nights crunching the numbers –or just taking some guesses– I’ve come up with a few to invest in. Let’s dive in…

BUYS

Jets 8.5 Wins – Perhaps I’m a Jets homer, but I think this is a slam dunk. I can’t help but laugh when people say “Oh the Jets are the third best team in the division!”. We’ve been hearing that same crap for 3 years now, and it’s yet to happen. The fact is, the Dolphins and Bills just aren’t that good, and that isn’t going to change this year. Last year, the Jets had a disaster of a season, and they still finished with 8 wins and easily could have had one or two more. This year I’m expecting 4-2 in the division (split with Pats, 3-1 vs. Bills and Fins), and then score very likely wins against the Colts, Cardinals, and Chargers at home; and Rams, Jaguars, and Titans on the road. That leaves tough games in Pittsburgh and Seattle (always a tough place to play), and against the 49ers and Texans at home. A split amongst those 4 isn’t unlikely. With a potentially dominant defense and an offense that improved simply by getting rid of Brian Schottenheimer, I just don’t see this team not winning 10 or 11 games.

Cowboys 8.5 Wins – I hate backing the Cowboys, because every offseason people look at their roster and talk about how this is the year they put it all together and they’re going to the Super Bowl. Just to be clear, I don’t think that, but I do think this team has enough talent to win 9 or 10 games. The only reason they failed to get there last year was because of a secondary that featured several guys whose performances rivaled Eric Smith. And as all Jets fans know, that’s not a compliment. This year, however, they added the best corner in free agency, Brandon Carr, and traded up to draft the best corner in the draft, Morris Claiborne. 9 wins here we come!

Bears 8.5 Wins – I’m a big Bears fan this year. Da Bears have Jay Cutler coming back from injury, they added Brandon Marshall and Alshon Jeffery to the receiving corps, and they brought in Michael Bush as Matt Forte insurance. Oh, and they still have one of the best defenses in the NFL. Not only do I think they easily clear 8.5 wins, but I think they have a chance to give the Packers a run for their money in the NFC North.

Ricky Sapp, Joe McKnight, Jeff Cumberland, Vlad Ducasse – Yes, even Vlad Ducasse. I’m buying this group of 4 “under the radar” players, because I’m very interested in hearing how they do in Mini-Camp the next few days. All 4 guys have a chance to contribute in a meaningful way this year, especially McKnight and Sapp.

Jenrry Mejia – As a Mets fan, I’m absolutely disgusted with their bullpen. I don’t know what the hell Sandy Alderson was thinking this offseason putting this group of bums together, but there is hope on the horizon — Jenrry Mejia. One of the best pitching prospects in the Mets system, they recently moved him to the bullpen in Triple A, with the intention of having him come up and rescue this sad sack of relievers. I’m excited. And yes, I know that makes me pathetic getting excited for a middle reliever, but I’m a Mets fan, what do you want from me?

Kevin Durant – I love the NBA. I hate the regular season when the players openly don’t give a crap, but the playoffs are awesome, and I love when a young guy breaks down the door and announces he’s arrived. That’s what Kevin Durant is doing right now, and I couldn’t be more excited to watch his Thunder take on the hated Miami Heat and LeBron James.

SELL

That John Malkovich iPhone Commerial – Ugh. Had to mention this one first. I can’t be the only person who gets legitimately angry every time this commercial comes on, can I? And I can’t help but think Apple has a few more of these atrocities ready to put out there. It’s like they’re daring me to buy non-Apple products, knowing full well I am going to just sit here, do nothing, and continue to watch John Malkovich commercials while playing on my iPad. Screw you, John Malkovich.

Lions 9.5 Wins – I’m sorry, but I think the Lions are going to take a tumble this year. They’re the sexy pick for “Team Ready to Take the Leap into Super Bowl Contention”, but I don’t see it. The secondary still stinks, the offensive line is a mess, their coach is a raving lunatic, and this might be the year Ndamukong Suh attempts to become the first player to use the football to actually beat an opposing player into a coma. That’s not to mention Matt Stafford miraculously avoided injury all of last year, and is unlikely to happen again. I can see this Lions season going very, very badly.

Chiefs 8 Wins – Maybe I’m missing something, but I just don’t see this at all. The Chiefs just aren’t that good. They have a solid defense, but questions at quarterback, Jamaal Charles is recovering from a blown out knee, and last I checked, Romeo Crennel is their head coach. Sell this one.

Dolphins 7.5 Wins – Sorry Dolphins fans, this one is going way under. As of now, the #1 quarterback on the depth chart is David Garrard. Yes, that David Garrard. The one who was out of football last year. The one who will be throwing passes to…umm, Brian Hartline? Davone Bess? Oof. The only way that can be worse is if they sign someone like Chad Ochocinco. Oh wait, that’s exactly what Jeff Ireland did. On the bright side, they have a solid defense and a pretty easy schedule, but the fact is, the Dolphins are the exact team other teams’ fans see on the schedule and say, “That should be a win there.”

LaRon Landry – Let’s just say I’m starting to get a little nervous about this guy and his prospects for the 2012 season. I’ll reserve judgment until closer to the season, but it’s not looking all that promising.

Boxing – I’m selling the sport as a whole. I know this same thing has been written 500 times since the fixed Pacquiao vs. Bradley fight on Saturday, but the sport is just a joke. I wish we could organize a worldwide boycott of a rematch if it comes to fruition, because seriously, what’s the point? The only guy I’d pay to watch fight at this stage is Mike Tyson, and that’s not a joke. At least that would be entertaining.

Tebow (!!!) Coverage at Mini-Camp – Get ready, Jets fans. The Jets are holding a 3 day mini-camp this week, and we’re about to get bombarded with Tim Tebow information. Not only will we know about every pass he throws within 10 seconds of it slamming into the turf, but get ready to find out some real important personal things about Tebow; things such as: his favorite color, his favorite book, his pick on the NBA Finals, if he prefers Coke or Pepsi, and what toppings he likes on his hot dogs. Crap, I think I just gave the media some ideas. My bad, Jets fans. My bad.

Turn On The Jets Stock Watch: Jets, NBA, Mets, and Mad Men

Mike Donnelly gives us his weekly Stock Watch. Who is he buying and selling this week?

Mike Donnelly is back with his weekly Stock Watch, which will be published every Tuesday throughout the summer. Check back in tomorrow for our first edition of Jets Beat Writers Power Rankings – JC 

Just as with the initial Jets Edition of the Stock Watch, we’re going to be buying and selling individual players, teams, coaches, ideas, and whatever else we see fit based on their future prospects. We’re going to be doing this with our fake money in our fantasy land where these things can be bought and sold, so bear with me. And as always, feel free to contact me via Twitter @TheMikeDonnelly . Now let’s do some buying and selling…

BUY

Jets West – If I had the opportunity to buy some stock in Jets West 2012, I’d load up. It got plenty of attention the past two years with Mark Sanchez bringing his teammates out west for some good old fashioned team-building without coach supervision, but this year TEBOW(!!!) is involved! And as we all know, when Tebow is involved, things get out of control pretty quickly. Look for Jets West to be featured non-stop on television and talked about endlessly on Twitter. Of course, the story SHOULD be how Mark Sanchez is the undisputed leader of the team and has the respect of his offensive teammates, but Tebow’s mere presence will not allow for that. I’m amazed that a Jets player planning to attend Jets practices could be such a big story, but evidently it is.

On the bright side, I’m starting to think that in a roundabout way all of this nonsense is going to be very beneficial for Sanchez, and he’s going to come out playing with some serious fire this season. Plus, getting new receivers Stephen Hill and Chaz Schilens out west along with slot man Jeremy Kerley, and the formerly disgruntled Schottenheimer-hater, Santonio Holmes, should allow Sanchez to get comfortable with his receiving corps. And as we all know, that was not a luxury he was afforded last year with all the comings and goings, like the foolish swapping of Edwards and Cotchery for Mason and Plaxico. Which brings me to..

Mark Sanchez – Get used to seeing him here in the Buy section. With Brian Schottenheimer’s dismissal and the addition of a true deep threat in Stephen Hill, I’m expecting big things from the Sanchize this year. Remember all those fake shares you bought after last week’s column? Let’s add a few more to it.

The Mets Pitching Staff – This is strictly limited to the Starting pitchers, because watching their bullpen makes me feel like I just saw a puppy get hit by a car, but wow, what a week for the Mets. Between Johan Santana’s no-hitter, R.A. Dickey’s shutout, and Jon Niese’s near-shutout, the Mets announced themselves as serious contenders in the NL as long as the rotation remains in tact (which all Mets fans know is nearly impossible, given their incompetent medical staff, but still..). Throw in big time prospects Zach Wheeler, Matt Harvey, and to a lesser extent Jenrry Mejia, and the Mets are shockingly putting together a potentially dominant pitching staff. Let’s add some Mets stock to our portfolio and pray Johan’s arm doesn’t fall off in the next few weeks.

Rajon Rondo – Anybody watching the NBA Playoffs knows what a joy Rondo has been to watch these past few weeks. He’s playing absolutely out of his mind, and even better, he keeps taking hilarious shots at the Miami Floppers–err, I mean the Heat–through the media. Keep up the great work, Rondo! I’m buying.

The 46 Defense – After basically being wiped out of NFL playbooks for the past two decades, Rex Ryan and the Jets are bringing back the 46 defense in a big way this year. With the additions of Quinton Coples, Demario Davis, Laron Landry, and Yeremiah Bell, Rex Ryan has added a lot of the pieces he thinks are necessary to replicate his father’s famous dominant defenses in Chicago. In addition, he brought in widely respected defensive line coach Karl Dunbar to work with Coples, Mo Wilkerson, Aaron Maybin and the rest of the defensive front on their pass rushing technique. Look for all these moves to pay major dividends this year and other teams to follow suit. After all, the NFL is a copycat league, and you can expect to hear plenty about the 46 defense going forward.

Michael Ginsberg – No, this is not a new addition to the Jets defense or something like that, but all my fellow Mad Men fans know who I mean. With Peggy off finding out if the grass truly is greener on the other side, and Don desperately looking to go after the big fish, he needs Ginsberg more than ever–and to make matters worse for Don, Ginsberg knows it, too. Mr. Draper has started to realize he’s slightly out of touch and the 60‘s are passing him by, while Ginsberg has the new “cool” ideas the company needs. I’d load up on Ginsberg stock; he’s on the fast track.

SELL

Lane Pryce – Allow me one more Mad Men thought here, and please, stop reading if you haven’t seen this week’s episode, because I’m going to spoil it for you. Seriously, you’ve been warned! Last chance. Ok.. This one is pretty obvious, but it’s pretty safe to unload all your Lane Pryce stock at this point after he totally bottomed out this week and committed suicide. We saw this one coming all season, but man, how depressing was it that poor Lane couldn’t even kill himself right? His brand new Jaguar wouldn’t start, so he had to resort to sadly hanging himself in his office, next to his New York Mets pennant. The poor guy could never quite catch a break. Ok, that’s the end of my Mad Men ranting for the week. Let’s move on..

Plaxico Burress – Oh, what’s that? Plaxico hasn’t even gotten a sniff in free agency this year? Wow, I am completely shocked that a receiver who can’t run, can’t get down the field, and can’t separate from cornerbacks hasn’t been scooped up. Plaxico hamstrung Mark Sanchez and this offense last year far more than Jets fans realized. I think it may be all over for Mr. Burress. Plaxico stock is a dud.

Justin Blackmon and Jaguars Fans (all 18 of them) – I have no sympathy for Blackmon, who is a total idiot, but I feel bad for the fans. Just when they thought they had a good receiver for the first time since Jimmy Smith, it turns out he’s a complete moron and likes driving around completely hammered at 3am. Great. He deserves to be punished for this, especially since it’s his second offense. And he will, but man oh man, that is not the way for your first round pick to start his career. I wouldn’t invest in this situation.

NBA Officials – It doesn’t get much worse than the performance the NBA Officials have put on as a whole in these playoffs. Whether it’s just awful calls or flat out rigging the games, these playoffs have been especially painful to watch. It’s gotten so bad that I have pretty much waited until a few minutes into the game to see which team the refs are favoring, then root for the underdog playing 5 against 8.

Quinton Coples Critics/Bashers – It was a popular thing to say during the draft process that Quinton Coples was a “boom or bust” player with questionable work ethic. Well I firmly believe Coples is going to make all of those people eat their words. It’s only June, but all reports out of Jets camp are that Coples is the real deal, and he’s going to be a terrific fit in this attacking style defense. He’s got all the tools, and he’s going to have some of the best defensive coaching in the NFL between Rex Ryan and assistant Karl Dunbar. All the people who bashed Coples will have changed their tune by the end of 2012.