Turn On The Jets Week 6 NFL Buffet – All The Parity

Joe Caporoso with a preview of week 6 of the 2017 NFL season in this week’s BUFFET

Every Wednesday or Thursday during the 2017 season, Joe Caporoso will break down the upcoming week of NFL action. Unfasten the belts and prepare to gorge on another weekend of fandom, fantasy, gambling, tweeting, cheering, complaining…and complaining. 

The Backdrop 

Every team in the AFC right now has either 2 or 3 wins outside of the 5-0 Kansas City Chiefs, 1-4 Los Angeles Chargers and 0-5 Cleveland Browns (analytics said they had no need for Deshaun Watson, unfortunately). The NFC is a little more separated as all teams but five have 2 or 3 wins (Eagles, Packers, Panthers, 49ers, Giants). All the parity is a good thing at this time of the year as most fanbases are still harboring dreams of a playoff run, until the cruel reality of late October and early November football squashes most of it.

We are through the early working out the kinks stage of the NFL season and on to the time where teams, despite their injuries, should start functioning at a higher level. The rate of bizarre, misplaced upsets is likely to decline somewhat and separation in the standings will slowly occur. This is the time of the year where team’s depth is tested and their coaching staff’s ability to make adjustments to early season issues is put under the microscope. It is also when teams with an advantage at the game’s most important position. quarterback, will thrive more often than not. Inconsistent quarterback play, limited depth and poor coaching eventually comes to get you, no matter what the early season standings say.

A Three Team Tease Is Always A Bad Idea But…

  • Houston (-3.5), New England (-3), Lions (+12)

Bet on Deshaun Watson over Kevin Hogan, particularly against the team who didn’t consider him with the first pick in the NFL Draft. Bet on Tom Brady against Josh McCown. The Lions should be able to keep it close versus New Orleans, if not win outright.

Record: 1-4

Primetime Parlay 

  • Denver (-11.5), Carolina/Philadelphia (Under 45.5)

Thursday night under always make sense, particularly with two good defenses playing each other. Denver should handle what is left of the Giants roster.

Record: 1-4

Straight Up 

  • Tampa Bay (-2)

10 days to prepare for a depleted Cardinals roster should be enough for a Bucs team coming off a tough, last second loss to New England.

Record: 2-3

FanDuel Fun 

  • QB – Deshaun Watson
  • RB – DaVonta Freeman
  • RB – Todd Gurley
  • WR – DeSean Jackson
  • WR – Amari Cooper
  • WR – Keenan Allen
  • TE – George Kittle
  • K – Matt Prater
  • D – LA Rams

Overrated Snack Of The Week 

Cheez Doodles! 

If you are going to get your fingers caked in orange dust, ruin your laptop, pants and couch cushion…go with Cheetos, not Doodles. You are getting no crunch here and it is harder to eat five of these at once.

Random Internet Complaint 

OMG LOOK AT THESE PLAYOFF MATCHUPS IF THE SEASON ENDED TODAY…JUST LIKE WE ALL PREDICTED! (It is week 6, everyone).

Survivor Pick Power Rankings 

  1. Denver
  2. Houston
  3. New England

Survivor Status: Dead! 

Random NFL GIF 

The Bears two point play has been done before!

Assorted Predictions

  • The Giants and Browns are NOT getting their first win this weekend.
  • The Eagles winning streak is coming to an end vs. Carolina
  • Le’Veon Bell will get at least 20 carries on Sunday.
  • Adrian Peterson will have less than 40 yards rushing for Arizona.
  • Miami will make a quarterback switch.

NFL Coach Reminders  

  • Don’t play your very injured quarterback (Mike Zimmer!)
  • Don’t run shovel option passes inside the 4 yard line (Hue Jackson!)
  • Don’t leave time on the clock for Aaron Rodgers (Jason Garrett!)

Photo Credit: NFL.com 

Author: Joe Caporoso

Joe Caporoso is the Owner and EIC of Turn On The Jets. His writing has been featured in the New York Times, Huffington Post, MMQB and AdWeek. Caporoso played football his entire life, including four years at Muhlenberg as a wide receiver, where he was arguably the slowest receiver to ever start in school history. He is the VP of Social Media at Whistle Sports

  • John C

    Cheetos makes puffy Cheetos too, you know! I prefer the Wise Cheeze Doodles, and so do my Grandsons. Jax are in third place!